Momentum
by duskbutterfly
Summary: He'd had the opportunity to tell her how much she meant to him when she'd asked why he needed the number of her pager but he couldn't find the words. She'd been hurt by his reticence ended up cutting him out of her weekends altogether. Do they have enough momentum to change status-quo? Set between Season 4: Ep11 (Drive) & Ep12 (Paper Soldiers). Two parts, one from each perspective.
1. Part I: All I Hear (Eric)

**AN: **For everyone waiting on the next chapter of Someone, I'm sorry it's coming very soon! I've been toying with this ever since Drive because my life has been too crazy (2013 is living up to its superstitious worst so far) to be much good for carrying out careful story plans but fingers crossed things are on the up now. This is my response to Eric and Nell's current stand-off, set between Episode 11 (Drive) and Episode 12 (Paper Soldiers). It's in two parts: the first part from Eric's perspective, the second from Nell's but I think there's enough that's unique in each that they aren't pure re-runs. As always, I welcome critics.

**Dedication: **To all the critical reviewers on FF-Net but with special thanks to: SilverSentinal21, Chloris, NCISNewbie & BlackRook for keeping me honest whenever I get lazy and picking up all the things I miss, you make me a better writer every time.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own NCIS, NCIS: LA or anything affiliated with either of them.

* * *

.

**Part I: All I Hear**

.

It was stupid really, thinking one mistletoe kiss and two Christmas elf costumes were going to change them forever. That it had more momentum than the overwhelming force that kept status quo. Despite each of them advancing and retreating like waves toward one another they never truly met halfway.

There were so many things he wanted to do differently. So many times he'd wished he'd had a pause button so he could try and process the opportunity presented and act; rather than them slipping through his fingers like sand. He wanted to take back his shell-shocked but incredibly stupid "what was that" and reach for her instead - attempt to liquefy her mind with pleasure the way she'd done to his. He wanted to have had the courage, when they'd been leaving the Christmas party, to ask if she wanted to do something to celebrate Christmas _together_ rather than parting with her going home to Skype her family, knowing she'd probably spend the rest of the day alone.

He'd had the opportunity to tell her how much she meant to him when she'd asked why he needed the number of her pager but he couldn't find the words. She'd seemed so set on cutting him out of her weekends (the way she said it, it felt like her whole life) that he'd fallen back on work as an excuse and paid the price.

It was even worse than a few weeks ago when the team saw them leaving and assumed they were leaving together and Nell had asked him if they were. That was mostly explainable by not wanting to put her in an awkward position with the team. He could blame the heat of the moment, panic - there were lots of undesirable factors in that case. This time it was just the two of them and it had started out so well or at least it seemed like it had been going well. His heart still skipped a beat thinking of the first half of her sentence ('...when we're at work _together...')_ but his hopes had gone up in flames when she'd mentioned going completely unplugged for the weekends and were totally cremated by the time she'd refused to give him the number of her incredibly retro pager.

And now, sitting on the beach, the one place usually he could think of all the things he was never able to say - he was still tongue-tied. Still petrified that if he pushed she'd make it not just her weekends but everything. Nell was the only person who could get under his skin to the point where there was no solace - not on days like today. He'd tried. This had been his first port of call after a day of realising she was back to pushing him away. But the adrenalin rush of watching the waves he was about to battle, which normally drowned out everything else, was no match for Nell saying over and over in his head that she didn't want him in her life - well, her weekends - as though it meant nothing. It felt like she was carving him up with a Katana every single time.

He couldn't let this chance slip away too. He needed to know whether he should be trying to recapture their one moment of bliss or trying to bury it so deep inside his heart that he'd be able to let his best friend have her solitary weekends if that's what she wanted. Because, at the end of the day, he'd do whatever she wanted. He was so far past the point of being able to give her anything less, even if it meant there wasn't ever any hope of anything more. He couldn't lose her and the only way to prevent that was to clear the air.

It was on the edge of the beach, where it met the road, watching the stormy swell pound inexperienced surfers and elevate those truly worthy opponents to the momentary ability to fly - that he found his courage. With a calm that belied the importance of what he was about to do, he loaded his still dry board back on the roof racks, ready to do battle of a different kind.

.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*

.

Standing on the porch of the big old house that had been converted into four apartments, Eric looked up. Noting as always the north-facing window, which was the only piece he could see of the place Nell had fallen in love with after a year cramped in a small, ultra modern high-rise. It had been an incredible day when she'd announced she'd found the perfect place and was in negotiations to buy it. The knowledge that she wouldn't be leaving town any time soon had surpassed even the excitement he'd felt at being asked to test drive the prototypes for the original iPhone.

The apartment had been advertised by someone looking for a housemate until the lease was up in six-months. Nell had gone along mostly out of curiosity because it looked, from the outside, to have been built in the late 1880s just like her parents place which had been in the family for generations. She'd managed to convince the guy who owned it to sell that apartment to her at the end of the six-month lease instead. He'd originally hoped to be able to one day convert them all back into a family home but after being hit hard by the financial crisis he hadn't been able to let pass the offer of ready money in a housing market that had been crashing and burning for years.

So Nell had gotten her little piece of home and the team had arranged an impromptu housewarming party on the day she got the keys. Standing in the hallway outside her new front door Callen had opened the champagne as she stuck the key into the lock and they'd all been ready to cheer when the door opened - except that Nell had tried to turn the key and nothing had happened. It hadn't taken long to figure out the last person had changed the locks and five lock picking kits had swiftly materialised out of pockets and bags. Nell, not having been trained in the art, had stood back next to Eric while Sam, having overruled the proposed scissors-paper-rock decider, made quick work of the lock then insisted on checking the place was 'free of threats and lurking former residents'. In the end it was just Hetty, Nell and Eric left in the hall while the four of them 'cleared' each room. Eric could only describe what happened next as a moment of temporary insanity. When the 'All Clear' had been announced he'd swept Nell off her feet and carried her across the threshold. Her initial protests had died down the moment he set one foot inside the apartment and it had been into complete silence that he'd whispered "Welcome Home, Nell" and gently kissed her cheek before he set her feet back on the ground. Only then had they become aware of their audience. They'd been rescued by Hetty's observation that 'there'd be no _fizz_ left in their champagne if they were all going to just stand around looking at one another all evening'. But it had hung between them all evening.

He had, ever after, had a real affection for the place. Steeling himself he pressed the buzzer for apartment one and waited.

"Eric, what you are doing here?" Nell's voice, despite the distortion of poor amplification (it emerged from the small speaker next to the bell), sounded high, surprised and not exactly pleased.

Not the beginning he'd hoped for but he'd psyched himself into this and he wasn't about to back down now. Taking a deep breath and looking up at the late-1800s-style lamp he'd given her as her housewarming gift, into the camera-lens he'd installed in it, he bit the bullet.

"I know you said you were going unplugged so clearly Friday night movies and video games are out and you said that Hetty could always reach you in an emergency, and it's not an emergency but I want to still see you because -" Eric swallowed, his heart racing, amazed he'd made it this far without screwing up, "- because knowing that we would probably do something Friday night and bounce messages back and forth on Saturday or Sunday is what makes the prospect of not seeing you for two whole days seem okay. And maybe we could play board games or -"

"Now there's an offer you can't refuse." The voice was unmistakably male and positively dripping with sarcasm.

Eric wanted nothing more than to spontaneously combust or be struck down by lightning or anything actually that meant he instantaneously ceased to exist so he wouldn't have to deal with the fact he'd just made the biggest mistake of his life. He stood, eyes closed, frozen in place waiting for Nell to answer. The milliseconds felt like eons.

"Chris! What are you -"

Eric didn't want to hear anything else. There was no need for him to make things difficult or any more awkward than he already had. So he found his voice again and looking squarely at the camera with his last shred of courage, he took advantage of her momentary pause between words and announced his exit, stage left.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come. Just forget it okay, I'll see you Monday." And shoving his hands into his pockets he turned and walked away.

In an effort to prevent himself from thinking (about the train wreck he'd just created; or who the mysterious 'Chris' was to Nell; or why she'd decided to kiss him under the mistletoe if this guy was also in the picture...) Eric counted the stairs in each flight as he entered the park across the street from Nell's place. 16, 17, 16, 18, 16. You descended from street level down a set of small stone steps towards the river while beside you there were larger steps, with about a two-foot drop and spanning closer to four-foot wide. On weekend mornings they became pop-up cafes and stalls and in the afternoons they tended to gather a menagerie of people from rowers to goths, young families to elderly couples, who played or worked or just sat and watched the world go by. Now, dusk on a Friday, there were a smattering of small groups and individuals all absorbed in their own activities, no one looking at the lone guy moving quickly down the stairway wishing he could erase the last twenty minutes of his life and dreading the end of the weekend for the first time in almost two years. He had his headphones in and while he had absolutely no idea what was playing, he was thankful he couldn't hear the laughter or conversations going on around him. Thankful also that he'd left his car on the other side of the park because driving when this distracted would be like Kensi driving wearing his glasses.

It was a complete surprise therefore to have someone grab onto the sleeve of his shirt from behind, forcing him to stop mid-step before yanking out one of his headphones. Bewildered he spun round, ready to give whoever it was a piece of his mind and instead, came face to face with Nell.

"You can't say something like that then disapp-" / "Look I'm sorry, alright, I didn't know you -" Nell and Eric said together, each determined to say their piece first. Only to be interrupted by a voice Eric would never forget.

"Seriously?! What _is_ it with you two? Kiss and -"

This time they managed to speak as one, "Not now, Chris!"

Nell rolled her eyes and, as if only just realising she still had an iron grip on Eric's shirt attempted to smooth out the wrinkle with one hand while motioning to Chris with the other. "Eric, meet my brother Chris. Chris, Eric."

Incredulous that the person who he'd decided, without ever laying eyes on, he hated beyond words was in fact related to Nell, Eric scanned him rapidly. On first glance they were as similar as night and day. Where Nell was petite and tended to hide her strength (not to mention intellect) behind cute little dresses and cardigans; Chris was the same height as Eric and there was unmistakable confidence in his stance. His plain black t-shirt and well-worn jeans emphasized rather than hid the lean, muscular physique of a quick and formidable opponent. Setting aside differences in style you couldn't help but be drawn to the distinctive and identical shade of auburn they shared. Looking closer there were clear facial markers which were common to both too despite the obvious distinctions of gender and, loathe as he was to admit it, it was very difficult to stay angry with the owner of a matching set of the hazel eyes to the ones he loved.

"It's nice to finally meet you," Chris said, putting out a hand for Eric to shake.

Eric latched on to the word 'finally' as a sign for hope but looked to Nell for approval before taking Chris' hand, a move which was met with a laugh and a sardonic: "I like him, knows where his loyalties lie." from Chris.

"Now, you obviously care for her -" Chris began.

"A lot." Eric put in firmly.

"- right, you care for her a lot and you seem like a respectable guy -" Chris managed to stifle the protest Nell was trying to squeeze in between his words by charging on a few decibels louder, "- or at least that's the one-word version, we tend to hear about you in fifteen-minute blocks -" he winked at Nell, unperturbed by her visible agitation, "and usually I'm all for chasing guys off and god help you if you hurt her but seriously, it's been like -"

Eric, stunned and completely confused as to what side Chris was on, was starting to almost like the guy. He managed to set up the expectation (and Eric had no doubt he'd follow through if necessary) that Eric would face a fate worse than death if he put one toe out of line without being overbearing or condescending towards Nell's autonomy. Nell clearly had something other than liking in mind because Chris, who had neatly sidestepped the hand that should have caught him smack in the chest, was about to get a piece of her mind if Eric was reading her right.

"Enough Chris. Remember our deal, you've been introduced, you can go now." Nell sounded cross but there was the hint of a smile was tugging at her lips at his 'hands in the air' style retreat.

"Alright, alright, I know when I'm not wanted."

Apparently committed to his retreat, Eric watched as Chris started jogging back in the direction of Nell's apartment but he didn't get long to savour the relief. Just before reaching the top of the first flight of stairs Chris turned back and, flashing a devious smile, called out, "be safe!"

Nell winced but chose to ignore the comment. Eric couldn't have found words to mention it even if he'd wanted to. It was about as close as he'd get to tacit approval.

"I'm sorry, he can be a bit weird around guys I like -" Nell paused as a light blush spread across her cheeks then rushed on, changing tack slightly. "He's actually a good guy; under the sharp edges, teasing and sarcasm but I didn't think you'd believe he is really my brother without meeting him. We're too alike for there to be any mistake when we're standing next to each other. As you heard at the apartment he can be a bit - interfering -" Nell paused as if looking for another word but Eric took the opportunity.

"It's okay. Look I'm sorry -"

"Just let me get this out okay? You can apologise after if you still want to."

Eric nodded, his head still whirling slightly with the concept Chris was being 'weird' because Nell liked _him_, not just because he was showing interest in her...he'd been expecting disapproval given Chris' first comment.

"About earlier. In Ops. The New Year's Resolution thing. After the Christmas party, well the mistletoe - uh, you didn't _say_ anything and I guess I wanted to see if you'd just been going along with it so you wouldn't hurt my feelings and I'd been thinking of going unplugged anyway so I went back to what I do best - pushing people away and I'm sorry, that wasn't fair."

Eric managed to wait a full five seconds to check she really was finished.

He'd bitten down so hard on his tongue to stop himself breaking in at the indecision and hurt in Nell's voice he'd drawn blood. He should never have allowed her to walk away from that first kiss or the Christmas Party. He'd been so blindsided at the time and she'd be blocking his every attempt to discuss it since he'd first tried the next morning. He tried to figure out when this had gotten so complicated and realised that from day one, they always had been.

Unclenching his teeth and forcing himself to go slow, letting her know she could resume talking if that's what she wanted, he reached out to cup her face in his hand, the tips of his fingers threading gently into her hair. He tried to tune out to the warmth of her skin and the way her pulse sped up at his touch.

"You're my best friend, Nell and I'm not any good with words but I want you in my life. However much or little you're prepared to share. I don't want to lose you and if that means not seeing you so you can have your tech free and work free weekends that's fine. I can write letters and own carrier pigeons so we can keep in touch. But if -" Eric paused as Nell's lips parted. Entranced by the way her tongue darted out to wet her lips he almost lost sight of what he'd been going to say but he knew he only had one chance to get this right and she hadn't broken in yet or pulled away - "but if you're pushing me away because you don't think I want you with every atom of my being then I'll have to show you."

Her movement was small, pressing her cheek ever so gently into his hand, but it was the permission he needed. With trembling hands and a rapidly accelerating heart rate he gently tipped her head back, wrapped his other hand around her waist and drew her towards him, leaning down so he could press his lips to hers.

It was the antithesis of their first kiss. It started out tentative, a question rather than a demand and slowly deepened as the space between them became progressively smaller. There was time to find out that she liked to be in control. She would drag his lips back to hers whenever he tried to explore the delicate line of her jaw but he could change the angle and, for just a moment, she'd give in and let him lead. Time to revel in the moment when she'd shifted so she was standing on her toes and the last, tiny space left between them had disappeared. Time to savour the way they were as evenly matched in this ancient art as they were fighting crime in the ultra modern Ops Centre.

Before he came he'd been afraid of losing her friendship, of sacrificing his pride and possibly making work a living hell. But now, with her fingers threading through his hair and her mouth moving hungrily under his, he was quickly discovering there weren't too many things he wouldn't sacrifice to be allowed to stay wrapped in her embrace.

It turned out sacrificing air wasn't an option.

Not that they hadn't put it off as long as possible. With his forehead resting against hers and her warm breath ghosting across his cheek, he was pretty sure he could do this forever and never get tired of it.

"213-911-3742" Nell whispered, her smile growing.

Eric thought he was going to have to again resort to 'what was that?' being the first words out of his mouth after kissing Nell. A terrifying idea considering what happened last time. Fighting the post-kiss haze that had engulfed his mind, he considered the number sequence; thankful he only needed to hear the string once to remember it. Ten digits in total beginning with 213? Eric grinned as his mind reached the only logical conclusion. He was willing to bet someone had pulled some strings to get that particular string but it was the sequence 3742 which he liked most, back in the days before smart phones, when SMS was new he'd typed it 1000s of times.

"Guess I don't need to worry about carrier pigeons after all." Eric whispered back, pressing a kiss to each corner of her smile.

"We might even have found something more interesting than board games to do on our weekends." Nell countered, steering his lips back to hers before he was able to clarify the all-important _'our' _that had him hoping for things he'd never before allowed himself to hope for.

* * *

_**Need Nell's take? Want to know what Chris & Nell had been talking about? Click Next.**_


	2. Part II: Love Thy Brother? (Nell)

******Disclaimer: **I still don't own NCIS, NCIS: LA or wish to claim any credit which is due to CBS who do own them.

* * *

**.**

**Part II: Love Thy Brother?**

.

Any other week she would have been over the moon to see Chris. Especially so soon after yet another Christmas and New Year spent far from home. Now as she sat across the kitchen table from him, hearing about his time spent assessing deep-sea divers for the Navy she wished he hadn't come. No actually, that wasn't true. She wished she'd never had that conversation with Nate about thinking of Eric like a brother and she wished she hadn't, just a few hours ago, told Eric she was going unplugged and effectively cut him out of her weekends for the foreseeable future. Now, looking at her real brother she had the treacherous feeling she'd rather be sitting opposite Eric.

"...and just for kicks we decided to blow up an oil rig."

Nell was brought out of her distracted and dismal thoughts with a crash as Chris' words broke through her melancholy.

"What?!"

"Calm down Red, I'm kidding. You clearly weren't listening so I decided to see what I had to say to drag that pretty mind of yours back to the present."

Nell sighed; he'd started calling her Red after she'd come home crying way back in Second Grade because of someone teasing her about her hair. Seven-years older and her undisputed idol he'd stood beside her in front of the bathroom mirror so she could see his hair was the same as hers and he'd told her it was pretty special to have red hair. He'd made Red his nickname for her so that she'd think of him every time anyone said it and smile because all it proved was that they were too stupid to realise how special they were. All these years on he was still going into protective older brother mode at the slightest hint of trouble.

"So, who's the guy?" Nell didn't manage to do more than think about protesting. "Uh-huh, I can still see straight through you. So let's skip the 'what guy' routine and get to the bit where you tell me his name and in general terms why I need to hunt him down and murder him for making you unhappy."

Nell grimaced, "It's mostly my fault." Chris' eyebrows shot up, "No seriously Chris, this one's all of my making. You see I was kind of upset because I couldn't be home for Christmas -"

"So he took advantage-"

"No," Nell winced, "That wouldn't be my fault, this was. It started with an elf costume."

"He bought you -"

"I bought him -"

"Is this G rated? Because if it isn't G rated I don't think I can listen without a stiff drink, you're still my little sister."

"Mind out of the gutter Chris. Outerwear only. It was for giving presents to children, but you asked remember."

"Are we getting to the point of Who and Why any time soon?"

"If you'd let me go more than 10-words in a row without jumping to conclusions or butting in you'd know it all already."

"Fine, continue. You bought him this costume, then what?"

"I might have been quite upset that the rest of the team were stranded on location over Christmas, they're like a second family." Nell chose to ignore Chris' groan, "Anyway, he said he'd go with me to the work charity night so I told him about the costume and he was going okay with it until we got to the leggings-"

"Hang-on! You asked this guy, who you like, to accompany you to a _work_ thing wearing tights? Were you trying to get him lynched?! No wonder you're miserable, I love you dearly but you wouldn't catch me dead -"

"Well he came. In costume."

"And you found out he was playing for the other team? Oh Red -"

"He's straight."

"But insane right? Risking reputation and limbs -"

"Perfectly sane but umm - well -" Nell looked down at her hands, feeling her face heat, "I may have put my costume on first and there might have been some mistletoe -"

"I've never been so glad I turned down law. I'd make a terrible JAG defence attorney. I'd be all for turning you in for blackmail or coercion and recommending he lays charges - providing he didn't-"

"No. For the hundredth time, he's a good guy."

"With sisters, I'm quickly discovering there are no good guys."

"Well he is one. And I wasn't _trying_ to blackmail him or make him do anything he didn't want to. But he gets so nervous around me and with everyone else out on this case, I just wanted to see -"

"You did _that_ to the guy we've been hearing about for a couple of years? The one that's practically your best friend ever and who literally worships the ground you walk on but you're not sure if you want to date?" Chris paused running a hand through already tousled hair as Nell nodded miserably, "Oh man, this is bad. Had you had anything to drink first? Anything we can use in your defence aside from temporary insanity?"

"No."

"Are you still talking? Or should I ask if he's still walking?"

"We were fine until today. I managed to find and destroy all of the photographic evidence in a 'better late than never' attempt to protect him from ridicule and there's still no one else that's seen the photos."

"So, what happened today then? And should I be pouring the scotch before or after you answer that?"

"It's not that bad. Well - " Nell sighed, "not in that sense anyway."

"Okay. So if you didn't cause his death or permanent physical or mental injury, what did happen today?"

"I told him my New Year's Resolution. Because we spend so much time together at work surrounded by technology I decided to go totally unplugged on weekends -" seeing his confusion, she tried to explain, "- not have phone or email or anything except a pager in case there was an urgent call from work."

"Okay. So he's a tech buff and it's hard for him to understand low tech but surely not impossible. Not 'let's desert the girl I am totally in love with and have been for years' kind of impossible. So what happened next?"

"He asked for the number of the pager."

"And that's a problem because?"

"I didn't give it to him."

"You'll have to explain that Red. My male brain can't process that stroke of female logic."

"I asked why he would need it and he said there might be an emergency at work and I said that was ok the director had it. He didn't say he wanted to speak to me."

"God help us. Just to clarify: you cry, he offers to go to the charity thing in costume, you argue probably making him feel like he's just been put through the wringer backwards, then he sees you in some costume and you kissed him which, combined with the above resulted in him wearing the costume and now, rather than things being okay, you say he can't have your new number? Because if that's right I'm afraid I'm on his side. You can't kiss your best friend, accept their sacrificial offering (risking life and limb wearing that costume) and then refuse to give him your phone number when you see him next after having dropped the bombshell that you can't be contacted without it. We aren't that resilient and there's this thing called dignity which prevents most of us from declaring love when we've already been told in not so many words that the object of our affection doesn't care about us at all. You'd flay me alive if I treated a girl like that."

"I know." Nell felt sick. She knew how she'd respond if he did it or if someone did it to him and this wasn't some random guy either, this was Eric.

"Honestly, if he was my mate and you weren't my sister I'd be telling him to walk away, that it wasn't worth it."

"So now what do I do now?"

"Hope like hell he is either: so crazy in love with you he's willing to be treated like crap or that he's extremely forgiving - preferably both. All assuming you _have_ decided you do want to go out with him."

"Gee thanks. Such a lot of comfort you are." Nell grumbled.

With a long-suffering sigh, Chris relented, "You really like him don't you? Otherwise he'd just be another name on your blacklist and we'd never be any the wiser."

"I-"

Whatever Nell had been going to say was cut off by the metallic buzz of the front doorbell making Nell wish she'd taken up Eric's offer to install a new system that at least wasn't so abrasive on the eardrums. Shoving that thought to the back of her mind, she reached over the kitchen bench to the phone connected to the door system and activated the screen.

Cursing under her breath and sending a panicked look at Chris, she pressed Talk.

"Eric, what you are doing here?" Nell grimaced at the high pitch she heard in her voice and wished for the second time that Chris wasn't here. She'd never live this down.

She was about to apologise; say it was a bad time, say anything to put this off for just a few more hours. Put it off until she had a plan. Then he looked directly up at the camera, his expression determined and she knew she'd lost her chance to run.

"I know you said you were going unplugged so clearly Friday night movies and video games are out and you said that Hetty could always reach you in an emergency, and it's not an emergency but I want to still see you because -"

Nell's heart skipped a beat when he paused. Apparently he _wasn't_ here to say they couldn't be friends, that she hadn't pushed him away one time too many? But could she actually cope with being just friends after that kiss?

"- because knowing that we would probably do something Friday night and bounce messages back and forth on Saturday or Sunday is what makes the prospect of not seeing you for two whole days seem okay. And maybe we could play board games or -"

"Now there's an offer you can't refuse."

Nell spun round to face Chris, momentarily stunned that he had to choose this _exact_ moment to make one of his endless sardonic remarks. He was supposed to be _helping_ not re-ruining everything. He'd said it quietly. It was a throw-away comment meant just for her but she knew from the slightly strangled noise that Eric had heard.

"Chris! What are you doing?" Nell hissed.

"Don't stand up here Nell where he can't see you, it's not fair - go talk to him. Apologise before he -"

As she listened to Chris' answer she heard Eric's voice from behind her -

"- just forget it okay, I'll see you Monday."

She whipped back around to see him hurrying down her front steps and walking resolutely towards the park, head bent. As she watched he rammed headphones into his ears with considerable force.

"What are you waiting for? Go after him!" Chris said urgently, shoving her gently towards the door.

"And tell him what Chris? Would you believe it if I tried to explain that my idiot brother couldn't keep his mouth shut and didn't realise how sensitive the speaker was?" Nell snapped, shoving back.

"Fine, take me with you. He'd have to be dumb and blind not to realise we are related and besides, I've always wanted to meet the guy that's finally achieved your Herculean standards."

Nell bit her lip, looking from Chris to the retreating figure entering the park and back again. "Promise me you'll only stay long enough to prove your identity and then you'll go?"

"Cross my heart. But I can't swear I won't tell mum I've finally met the guy who carried you across the threshold. I promised her first and she scares me more than you do."

Scowling Nell grabbed her keys off the bench and shoved them into his hands before making for the door at a jog, not looking back to check he was keeping up.

It had never felt so far between her little apartment's door and the park steps. She didn't bother calling out despite Chris' continual jabs trying to make her do just that, she recognised the tell tale white cords of his headphones as the ones she'd modified for him. They looked just like a pair of traditional Apple headphones but unlike their look-alikes they actually cancelled out sound and made it almost impossible for anyone except you to hear your music. So, short of throwing something, she had to catch him.

It took considerable skill in timing to manage to latch onto Eric's shirt and pull both of them to a halt when the overwhelming momentum was to keep going downwards and he was a fair bit bigger than she was to start with. Her saving grace had been yanking out one of his headphones meaning he turned to face her, counteracting some of his own force.

"You can't say something like that then disapp-" / "Look I'm sorry, alright, I didn't know you -" Nell and Eric said together, each determined to say their piece first, only to be interrupted by Chris - _again_.

"Seriously?! What _is_ it with you two? Kiss and -"

Nell wanted to murder her brother.

"Not now, Chris!" Nell snapped and was amused to hear Eric say it in perfect unison.

Nell rolled her eyes and realised belatedly she still had an iron grip on Eric's shirt. She attempted to smooth out the wrinkle but succeeded only in proving, beyond all doubt, that Eric had quite impressive muscles hidden under the thin layer of cotton. A distracting thought if ever there was one. Hoping she wasn't starting to blush Nell waved to Chris with her other hand. "Eric, meet my brother Chris. Chris, Eric."

Nell watched with unease as two of the most important guys in her life assessed one another. She could see Eric rapidly cataloguing their differences and if the way his eyes darted between her eyes and Chris' was any indication he'd noticed their most striking similarity.

"It's nice to finally meet you," Chris said, putting out a hand for Eric to shake.

Nell had to smile at the way Eric looked to her for approval before taking Chris' hand and while their shake was firm there was no sign either was trying to crush the other's hand.

"I like him, knows where his loyalties lie." Nell was pleased by Chris' evident approval. He tended to dislike her boyfriends on principle and not be shy about warning them off.

"Now you obviously care for her -" Chris began.

'_Oh god, no!' _Nell thought, '_this is _so_ not ok!' _Nell opened her mouth to try and stop Chris and got thrown off balance by Eric butting in first.

"A lot." Eric put in firmly.

Nell tried not to beam like the Cheshire Cat. Then Chris started talking again and her bubble of happiness shattered into 10,000 tiny pieces.

"- right, you care for her a lot and you seem like a respectable guy -" Nell tried to cut in again but Chris managed to stifle her attempts by raising his voice and plunging ahead with his monologue, "- or at least that's the one-word version, we tend to hear about you in fifteen-minute blocks -" he had the _audacity_ to then wink at her, "and usually I'm all for chasing guys off and god help you if you hurt her but seriously, it's been like -"

Deciding that all bets were now officially off Nell whipped her hand back, aiming for the centre of his chest. Like always, he'd seen it coming and moved with the speed and quiet grace that got him out of tight spots all over the world but the intent in the action had been clear. She was furious. This was _not_ helping. At all.

"_Enough _Chris. Remember our deal, you've been introduced, you can go now."

Nell tried to remain angry as he put his hands over his head and retreated. But she was battling a smile seeing her Navy trained warrior 'surrendering' with nothing more than an: "Alright, alright, I know when I'm not wanted." He turned as he reached the stairs and Nell sighed inwardly with relief.

"Be safe!" Chris threw back over his shoulder as he jogged back in the direction of her apartment

Nell winced. She almost wished she'd kept her keys so she could now throw them at him. Deciding he would get a piece of her mind once all of this was sorted, Nell tried to set it aside and steeled herself for the hardest part. Explaining to Eric why she'd been acting like a jealous fool.

"I'm sorry, he can be a bit weird around guys I like -" Nell blushed as her words registered in Eric's expression and she rushed on, "he's actually quite a nice guy under the sharp edges, teasing and sarcasm but I didn't think you'd believe he is really my brother without meeting him. We're too alike for there to be any mistake when we're standing next to each other. As you just heard at the apartment he can be a bit - interfering -"

Nell grimaced 'interfering' was a little too close to the truth. He was, in the most unhelpful way, trying to set them up. She never thought she'd wish his usual over protectiveness back but before she could think of a way to finish that sentence, Eric cut in.

"It's okay. Look I'm sorry -"

But Nell didn't want an apology from Eric.

"Let me get this out, then you can apologise after if you still want to."

'_Here goes nothing,'_ she thought desolately.

"About earlier in Ops. The New Year's Resolution thing. After the Christmas party, well the mistletoe - uh, you didn't say anything and I guess I wanted to see if you'd just been going along with it so you wouldn't hurt my feelings and I'd been thinking of going unplugged anyway so I went back to what I do best - pushing people away and I'm sorry. That wasn't fair."

For five seconds he just looked at her with that same, slightly pained expression and for a moment she thought he wasn't going to accept her apology. Then she saw the muscle in his jaw tick and realised he'd been forcing himself to wait till she was finished. She had plenty of warning when his hand reached out to cup her cheek. It made her think of a man reaching out to an animal that might, at any moment, take fright and bite him.

She probably deserved the wariness, given what she'd just said. She hoped he couldn't feel her pulse jump into hyperdrive the moment his fingers brushed her skin.

"You're my best friend, Nell and I'm not any good with words but I want you in my life. However much or little you're prepared to share. I don't want to lose you and if that means not seeing you so you can have your tech free and work free weekends that's fine, I can write letters and own carrier pigeons so we can keep in touch but if -"

Nell had barely been aware her lips had parted until he'd stopped mid-sentence. His eyes lingering on them as her tongue darted out to wet them, seemingly transfixed by the motion. But he managed to force his eyes back to hers and continue.

"- but if you're pushing me away because you don't think I want you with every atom of my being then I'll have to show you."

Until he'd said it she hadn't realised just how much she needed him to say it out loud. Yes, his actions suggested he cared about her but there was always that tiniest shadow of doubt that maybe she was seeing what she wanted to see. She'd had the lingering question: what if 'caring' was just admiration and friendship? Hearing him say, _'I want you with every atom of my being...' _made every moment of indecision, every doubt worth it.

Relaxing the rigid control she'd exerted to stop her reacting to that initial feel of his hand caressing her cheek, Nell moved that tiny bit closer. The anticipation built as gentle hands wrapped around her, drew her in and finally, when she didn't think she could take any more delays, no matter how respectful, he kissed her.

The mistletoe had been a stolen kiss. A brief taste of the forbidden fruit followed by a battle with her pride when he didn't stop her from pulling away. Now, with his words still ringing in her ears and her senses flooded with pleasure, she wondered if she should have given him a chance to catch-up rather than holding him at arms length to prevent rejection. She'd been so busy protecting herself she'd forgotten just how amazing those couple of seconds had been.

It had been amazing even without his full and active participation. Eric taking lead, that made her head spin. She had to keep drawing him back every time his lips left hers, intent on exploring the line of her jaw, because somewhere in the back of her mind she knew they were in a public place. She knew she needed to at least pretend to have some restraint, then he'd change the angle and for a couple of seconds all thought went out the window. Maybe it _wasn't_ rejection she was running from. Maybe she was running from this. Running from the fact this felt right because even now the strength of their attraction scared her a little. She didn't lose her breath, let alone her perspective over anyone. Except Eric.

With her forehead resting against his and the knowledge that all she had to do was lean in she'd be back to losing her breath, she made a decision. Restitution had been paid.

"213-911-3742" Nell whispered, her smile growing.

She could see the moment he not only realised it was the number of her pager but guessed perhaps a little of her reluctance to give it to him. It had been a momentary weakness that had her requesting the numerical equivalent of 'Eric' when Hetty had told her to pick four numbers for the end of her pager number. Apparently Hetty had all the 213 911 numbers at her disposal. Later she'd regretted it, knowing he'd recognise them but now, judging by his smile, she decided her Freudian slip just paid off.

"Guess I don't need to worry about carrier pigeons after all." Eric whispered back, pressing a kiss to each corner of her smile. His lips playfully skipped where she wanted them most but two could play games.

"We might even have found something more interesting than board games to do on _our_ weekends." Nell countered, capitalising on his momentary loss of focus as her words sunk in to steer his lips back to hers.

For once, maybe she wouldn't be hanging out for a case to come in or Monday to roll around...

.

* * *

_**Thanks for reading! As always, critics welcomed.**_


End file.
